Al-Qaeda Kidnaps Obama's Teleprompter

In an audacious raid Friday, al-Qaeda terrorists managed to slip past White House security and seize President Obama's teleprompter. Their demands were released in a grainy video, which apparently showed the president's teleprompter, bound and blindfolded but unharmed, while heavily armed masked men stood behind it, quoting from the Qur'an. The content of their demands is not being released.

Mr. Obama, visibly shaken, attempted to address the White House press corps on his own. "Words, uh, um, I, uh, heh-heh, well ..."

Bravely attempting to continue his speech without the teleprompter, Mr. Obama said, "Um, let me be, uh, clear. Um, this barbaric act will not be, you know, tolerated. And... We call on all nations to help us fi-fi-find that, uh, you know, teleprompter. You're either with us or, um, against us. And... I have authorized CIA director, uh, Leon Panetta to use, um, enhanced interrogation techniques to be e-e-employed to help us gain, um, like facts and stuff... that these uh, you know, evildoers may have. And... I have directed that one prisoner be executed every 30 minutes until they-they-they restore that, uh, you know, teleprompter."

Vice President Joseph "Fightin' Joe" Biden spoke next. "Let me at 'em!" the former senator growled. "I know where these people work. After our helicopter was forced down in Afghanistan, I held these thugs off for a week in bitter hand-to-hand fighting. You'd better mark my words: the only language these Neanderthals understand is brute force, and they're messing with the wrong man. Sure everybody thinks we're a bunch of imbeciles up here, and that may be true, but let me tell you, they've got another thing coming. We're in this fight for the long haul, or as I like to say it, 'If necessary for years, if necessary alone.'"

"Until that teleprompter is found," fumed Senate majority leader Harry Reid, we must, and we will prosecute this war to victory. I assure the president of the full, bipartisan support of the US Senate. Defeat is not an option."


"Why these terrorist animals aren't on the rack having their bones slowly pulled out of their sockets is beyond me," complained House speaker Nancy Pelosi. "I mean, I know that the 9-11 attacks were totally inappropriate, and like all Americans I was shocked by the environmental damage, but this latest action is beyond the pale. Clearly, it points to the failure of the last administration," continued Pelosi. "Contrary to my urgings to use any medieval form of torture they could conceive of, they insisted on being overly concerned about the rights and humane treatment of these, these, ugh! I don't care if I personally have to pull out their fingernails with rusty pliers! That teleprompter must be restored to the American people."

In the meantime, the Pentagon has cancelled all leave while anonymous sources report that the Strategic Air Command and nuclear missile submarines have had their level of readiness raised to DEFCON 1.

Source

Hey, it could happen ... [lol!!!]

Prayer Warriors Please Apply Within (Update)

Byron Scott
A few moments ago, I received a Facebook notice from a fellow church member that our Pastor has either had a heart attack or his pacemaker defibrillator has malfunctioned.

He and his lovely wife, Tricia, are in Atlanta for a conference when this happened. They are over 4 hours from home.

My humble request is, would y'all please whisper a little prayer of healing and comfort right now for them both? We've only known Byron since last December but have learned to really like him. They've both come to mean a lot to me.

May it please our merciful God and Father to heal Byron and bring them both safely home.

Thanks y'all. :o)

The grace of our Lord Jesus Christ be with you all. Amen. (Philippians 4:23)

***UPDATE: 31 May 2009 9:30 AM - From Pastor Scott "I want to thank you for the many prayers today. My heart got badly out of rhythm and my defibrillator slapped me. I spent 5 hours in Northside Hospital today but am now out. I am doing fine but will have to slow down on some of my activities. ***

Sounds like he is much improved! We'll be glad when he can come home and rest. Thanks y'all for your prayers and concerns.

Like, I'm So Totally Awe-summ, You Know?

Thank you Janeen at ChachanNeen for the Awe-Summ award. You are such a sweet gal. You're always so kind and I feel especially blessed. :o)

Janeen posted this award a couple of days ago, but like the lady that backed into her typewriter, I'm getting a little behind in my work.

Between gardening, running errands and regular household duties, it's been rather hectic of late.

The idea here is to list 7 things that make me awesome. This took some thought. I don't really care to sit around contemplating my strong points. Here lately I'd rather just contemplate my navel. At least I could rest awhile. [giggle]

1) I try to always have a good sense of humor, even in bad situations. I kid a lot but it's with affection.
2) I enjoy making others laugh and have fun. This brings me pleasure too.
3) I tend to be quite good at discerning others intentions. I can spot a bully from 30 paces ... and drop them in 20. [giggle]
4) I'm quite good with animals. Hubby said I should be a Veterinarian but I know I could never remember all those $60 words and medical terms.
5) I've had great successes with locating people, dead or alive.
6) Accounting, and subsequently research, is a strong point with me. I can trace a paper trail better than most. Even bad guys leave a paper trail. [wink]
7) I try to always "die daily to sin and be more alive to God". My Lord Jesus makes me strong in all the things listed above and hides my weaknesses in His goodness.

Alrighty then, if you're still with me [yawn] I'm suppose to pass this on to 3 ladies (sorry guys) who I think deserve this award. Actually, I would prefer to give this to ALL my bloggy friends, but rules are rules.

Envelope please ...

I've decided on in no particular order:
1) Margo at Life In The Short Lane
2) Linda at Life's A Calling Who's This?
3) Margaret at Nanny Goats In Panties

These lovely lady's consistently make me smile and help me get through the day.

There ... it was nice to do something that didn't involve wearing gloves.

An Example Of Typical Phone Lines In India

Click To Enlarge
My husband is a retired telephone man and was just appalled at the tangled mess! Can you imagine the headaches fixing these?? And this is where we call when there is a technical problem with a computer.

And yet another piece of the puzzle falls into place.

Grandpa Tell Me 'Bout The Good 'Ol Days

I thought it would be fun to share some of the drugs that were legal in the good 'ol days.

Bayer's HeroinA bottle of Bayer's heroin. Between 1890 and 1910 heroin was sold as a non-addictive substitute for morphine. It was also used to treat children with strong cough.

[hack] [hack] "Pass the Heroin, would ya dear? I feel a cold coming on."


Metcalf Coca Wine was one of a huge variety of wines with cocaine on the market. Everybody used to say that it would make you happy and it would also work as a medicinal treatment.


Mariani wine (1875) was the most famous Coca wine of it's time. Pope Leo XIII used to carry one bottle with him all the time. He awarded Angelo Mariani (the producer) with a Vatican gold medal.


Produced by Maltine Manufacturing Company of New York. It was suggested that you should take a full glass with or after every meal. Children were supposed to take half a glass.


Here's a paper weight promoting C. F. Boehringer & Soehne (Mannheim, Germany). They were proud of being the biggest producers in the world of products containing Quinine and Cocaine.

Maybe the Columbian's should mass produce these now? They could give them to the Mexicans to pass along to the black gangs in L.A. and they give them out as souvenirs with each purchase.

Just thinking out loud here.


Opium for Asthma. Now this one mystifies me. I don't see how opium would help someone with asthma unless it helped them not to give a rats @$$.

Who needs air when you've got pink elephants dancing on the head of a pin, right? [lol]


Cocaine Tables from 1900All stage actors, singers, teachers and preachers had to have them for a maximum performance. Great to "smooth" the voice.

This explains some of the strange sermons and beliefs I've read about from that time period ...


Cocaine drops were very popular for children in 1885. Not only did they relieve the pain, they made the children happy!

No doubt.


And lastly, there was opium for newborns. I'm sure this would make them sleep well because not only is it Opium, but it's also 46% alcohol.

No comment.


And now you know why it's always called the Good 'Ol Days! They .. were .. just .. one .. big .. blur .....

I'm Just Wild About Wildflowers

High Power Lines
Hubby and I went for a little drive close to the house late last week. We were suffering from a severe case of cabin fever from all the rain (but I didn't shoot 6 holes in it ala Jimmy Buffet song). I figured with all this moisture there had to be wildflowers worth photographing. Thank goodness we have a Jeep! Our poor clay dirt road is a bit messy now.

We also rescued a water turtle from the road on Sunday. Poor thing was covered with mosquitoes and nearly got run over. Hubby put him in a pond close by but away from traffic.

Well, without any further ado, here's some local wildflower photos.


Butterfly weed with a Hoverfly
Butterfly weed is a prolific spring wildflower in Southeast Georgia. Yep. The butterflies love it! This one had a Hoverfly (Syrphidae) paying a visit. Hoverfly's are non-stinging and are very beneficial. They eat primarily Aphids. You'll usually see them 'hovering' very close to the ground in groups.


European Elderberry (Sambucus nigra)
The Elderberry is not only a lovely addition to the spring wildflowers, but the berries are used to make [hic] Elderberry Wine. Don't worry Pappy, we're not selling it. "So, don't send 'dem revenuers around here! There's nothing to see behind that barn ..." [hic]

It's not advisable to eat the berries raw. The Elderberry must be cooked to fully remove all the toxins. I don't think they'll kill anyone but you'll get an upset tummy for sure. Elderberries contain potassium and large amounts of vitamin C, and have been proven in quite a few recent studies to shorten the duration of cold and flu symptoms, as well as strengthen the immune system. Also, the dried leaves mixed with lanolin help relieve burns and sunburns.

Some folks make jam from them too. Anything that makes pie works for me! :o)


Lizard Tail (Saururus cernuus)
Now this nifty looking little plant is commonly called "Lizard Tail". It likes wet feet. You'll find them growing in profusion down near creek bottoms and anywhere it's wet but not too sunny. They're also easy to find because Lizard's tail has a distinctive orange like-smell.


Goat's Rue (Tephrosia virginiana)
And this is my Jewel In The Crown today, a Goat's Rue! You heard right Margaret, it's named after a Goat (but not in panties). It doesn't smell like one though. [giggle] This is a very uncommon site. I even e-mailed my fellow Georgian, Mildred, and asked her "What is THIS??!" Because although all the wildflower plant books say it is a native here I have never seen this lovely little plant before.

The Goat's Rue is in the Pea Family (Fabaceae). It has several common names: Rabbit's Pea, Hoary-Pea, Devil's Shoestrings and Catgut. They sound like alibi's to me, like it's on the lamb. I guess this one is hiding out because there are no other Goat's Rue near it.

Goat's Rue and related species may have been used as a fish poison by Indians in some parts of the Americas. Cherokee women used a root decoction to strengthen hair and Cherokee ball players applied the decoction to their limbs to "toughen" them. It was given it to children as a tea to make them strong. It was used by the Cherokee and other tribes in various medicines for treating conditions ranging from worms to urinary problems and tuberculosis.

There's a warning too, apparently this plant may irritate the skin and the seeds may be toxic.

Ya think???!

Medicinally, European Goat’s Rue is mainly used to increase milk flow, both in nursing humans and in dairy cattle. It is also one of the herbs which can be used to lower blood sugar levels. It is an appetite stimulant and digestive tonic which promotes production of the various digestive juices, and is extremely useful for treating chronic constipation.

And now you know.

Hope you enjoyed the 'walk' in the rain with us.

Thanks for stopping by!

Excuse Me But There's No Apologies Here

Just a quiet moment to pay tribute to all veterans and those actively serving in our armed services.

In our home we appreciate and support our military more than words can express, with no apologies.

And we will never forget your sacrifices so that we may be free.

May God richly bless you and your families. Stay safe dear ones.