Thursday, December 18, 2008

My Three Mothers, Part II

Myra (Cook) Ackman

... continued from My Three Mothers, Part I ...

After my mother’s death in 1966, Dad remarried almost immediately to a woman he had only known a short time that had two children about my age from a previous marriage. This was such a disaster. My mother was barely cold in the ground and he was thrusting me from person to person with no regard for the outcome. This person was an odious woman who treated me like gum stuck to her shoe. So one night, I ran away, at the age of 11, I climbed from the bedroom window and started walking to Orlando (about 50 miles west of my home). I had no money, no extra clothes, no food, no clue what to do next but I was leaving. I couldn’t take the abuse from two people and figured I had nothing to lose. Dad found me before much time had passed (I was still in my hometown). He was uncharacteristically silent as I was returned home ‘unscathed‘. A short period later he and the odious one divorced (he never explained why but I doubt it was concern over my welfare).

During this time I also lost my grandfather (Dad’s father) and my mother’s brother, Uncle Darrell.

Dad then quickly remarried yet another woman whom he had only known a brief while. Myra remained my step-mother until she died in 2004. This was a third marriage for both. Myra also had children from previous marriages but they were all grown by then. Do you know how I learned about their marriage? Dad put me on a commercial airline flight to his family in western Pennsylvania, alone. He put a complete stranger, an airline stewardess, “in charge” of his little girl. I arrived back home and he blurted out, “This is your new mother.” Did we get along? Not at first. I was so badly traumatized by then, I’m sure I was quite a handful.

Myra had mild mental problems, nothing serious or dangerous, but I realize now how much she saved my life. She was never malicious or cruel and she did profess Christ as her Savior. She suffered a grindingly poor childhood growing up in the rural Kentucky Appalachian mountains. Her father was the Sheriff of their county and her mother worked odd jobs to make ends meet. I’m sure she must have put up with a lot of my sullen and confusing mannerisms. She very wisely scheduled for me to meet with a child psychologist who helped a great deal. Myra encouraged my being involved in a local church of my choice (wisdom beyond her years I realize now). I came to know Christ because of her and not end up in some drug infested hell hole with a needle up my arm. I never did illegal drugs, or anything illegal, actually. I always knew there was a Higher Purpose to life than what we’re wallerin’ around in down here because she took the time to continue my path down the right spiritual road. I think Mom must have started the ball rolling and Myra picked up the slack. For that, I will be eternally grateful.

Myra was a multi-talented person. She could cook like a professional chef, sew tailor made clothes or home decorations, paint realistic pictures, decorate, and always had a perfectly clean home. She was really smart and very self motivated. Because of her I learned how to cook, sew, clean, write letters and thank you notes, show up to work on time and properly dressed, have correct manners, and do all the things that are so important. And, most important of all, she stepped between me and my father many times. When his yelling, cussing, name calling would almost come to blows, like a professional negotiator she would bring a calmness into the situation. When I grew large enough to physically defend myself, and I could throw my own punches, Dad quit hitting. At the age of 18, with a nice fresh High School graduate diploma under my belt and the ink barely dry on the document, I left home forever. I’ve never looked back. My ’only’ mistake was marrying too young. I married the wrong man the first time because I had no confidence in my abilities to survive. He wasn’t evil or abusive, we just weren’t made for each other.

But that's how Myra "saved my life" by directing my footsteps as best a step mother could.

And, then I met Steve and my life really started.

But that’s another story. A very happy story! :o)

My father and Myra

Thanks for letting me pour my heart out. I needed that ... and I need YOU! Thank you and God bless.

… THE END …
♥ ∞

Wednesday, December 17, 2008

My Three Mothers, Part I

It must be the season but I’ve had unusually frequent thoughts of my mother lately. My adopted mother that is.

Sparky the Crumb Cruncher (1959)


To clarify things since it can be all so confusing for the uninitiated, I have had three mothers:

My birth-mother, who gave me life.

Marian Estelle "Mary" McMahan (1959)
FindAGrave Memorial

My adopted mother, who shaped my life.

Helen Mae Koethe (1944) before her marriage to Dad in 1948
FindAGrave Memorial

And my step mother, who saved my life.

Mrs. Myra Cook Morgan Ricketts
and my father at their wedding ceremony June 1968
FindAGrave Memorial



My birth-mother, Mary, was 17 years old and unmarried. In 1956, this was a tragedy! She dropped out of high school, ran away from home to south Florida to stay with family friends and had me secretly. Two days later, I was property of my new adopted family and she was free to go on her merry way to do more as she pleased.

Helen, my adopted mother, apparently wanted a child. My father did not want something that wasn’t blood-kin. He never said these words directly, but his actions were frequent reminders of this little fact until the day he died. But Helen had a mother’s instinct. My father didn’t permit me to discuss my mother or have photos of her after her death, so, I have few memories of her. But this is one that still lives in my mind:

I grew up in Titusville, Florida, not far from Playalinda Beach (aka Cape Canaveral). We practically lived at Playalinda since it was so close. One day, while at the beach, my cousin Ricky and I were playing in the surf. I think I was about 5 or 6 years old and Ricky was only about a year older. He began pointing at the waves exclaiming, “Look at all the balloons on the water!” So, I ran out there wanting to play with the “balloons” and horrors of horrors, they were Portuguese Man ‘O War! In short order I was covered with poisonous, stinging, grasping tentacles! It’s a bit of a blur, but I do remember Mom suddenly rushing over to me, and with no regard for her own safety, rapidly pulling the tentacles from my young flesh. She became horribly stung right along with me. Thankfully Aunt Helen (Mom’s sister-in-law) was also along and she drove us to the Hospital which was at least 20 miles away. I had to get some rather painful shots and was covered in some kind of salve for days. It was pretty terrible. My father was typically disgusted that I had “caused trouble”, etc. But I just remember how my mother rushed to the rescue of her baby, like a mama bear protecting her cub.

My mother was taken from me suddenly one summer day in 1966. She had had a bad heart acquired at a young age from a bout with Scarlet Fever (thus the fact she could not conceive). The brain hemorrhage was sudden which caused her already weak heart to seize. She wasn’t overweight and she didn’t smoke. It was a total surprise to everyone. Something that today, if caught early, probably would never have happened. She was only 40 years old. I’m told that everybody liked Mom. She was sweet, gentle, physically delicate and ever so kindhearted. And also, thank God, a Christian. I was only 10 years old, but I still remember the phone call my father received from Jess Parrish Hospital that day. I can remember the look of utter anguish on his face and the way he cried. It’s the only time I can remember him crying or acting human. Then I can remember him lashing out in anger.

I didn’t realize that my life would never be the same.

It was a couple days later at the funeral, just moments after they put my mother’s body in the ground, I was crying and asking “Where’s Mom? Why are they putting her in the ground?”. I was so confused and frightened. My father screamed at me inches from my face to “Shut up! You’re only adopted! Why do you care?!” My life stopped at that moment. It’s like he had reached into my chest and stopped my heart from beating. I felt numb and dead inside. Yep. He tore up his parent card, and my heart, that hot day in August. Amazingly, though, I do not dwell on this much or the painful years that followed. It’s all in the past and I know now that he was doolally.

Despite his abuse and neglect I still have a few treasured memories of a sweet, loving mother that shaped my life that carry me though hard times even today.

Always a silent hurt,
many a silent tear,
but always a beautiful memory
of one we loved so dear.

God gave us strength to bear it,
and courage to take the blow,
but what it meant to lose you

... no one will ever know
.
Author Unknown

….TO BE CONTINUED
♥ ∞

Tuesday, December 16, 2008

You Are Invited To The North Pole!



There was so much fun at the Muse-Swings Christmas In Bloggyland Tour, that one of my other wonderful bloggy buddies has decided to "host" her own bloggyland party. With all these festivities and delightful food, I'm never gonna lose weight! This one will last from December 22nd to December 24th (Christmas Eve). What a splendid idea!

These are the rules:
1. If you're interested, inform Linda by replying at her blog. Place this invitation on your blog .. so we can make sure you are visited also.
2. You may give the reindeer carrots and sugar cubes.
3. The elves are friendly, but please remember, they are very busy.
4. Finally, have fun! And remember to laugh and smile.

I don't know about you, but I'm bringing LOTS of vino [uh hum] again ... and, I guess, a little food. Don't want anyone keeling over in the snow from hunger. [tee hee] It's doubtful if Gregory (of Peck and Paw Tours) will be able to attend. He's probably off somewhere with LL and her *borrowed* credit cards. But I'll be sure to sequester Santa for a moment, as he is a special friend of mine, for a visit before he's off on his travels. Don't want to delay him too long though, he does have to bring me that dirt bike!

So, please sign up at Linda's Life's A Calling blog today! It's going to be fun, fun, FUN!!

♥ ∞

Monday, December 15, 2008

A Christmas In Bloggyland Tour

Welcome! To the 1st Annual Christmas In Bloggyland Tour! Hosted by the lovely and gracious MuseSwings.

Wahooo!! Y'all saddle up! I'm all set!
It's time for Christmas In Sparky Land.

Sweetie, and a few unemployed elves, helped me decorate our humble abode in preparation for your arrival ...

... and Santa stopped by to help decorate the 2 wheeled conveyances ...

I've even put the dogs in a spare room for the evening. They'll be happier in there anyway. TVLand is showing back-to-back Lassie reruns. That should placate them for awhile.

I've got my bestest togs on (note the new motorcycle in the background for quick getaways) ...

So, don't be shy.
Help yourself to the vino and chocolate treats while you're here.
I have Jury Duty and have to skedaddle,
but I don't think they'll mind if I have a little nip?? .... [hic - 'scuse me]

I drug out the extra sofa to crash on for those who imbibe in a little too much with the hair of the dog (I'm looking at you Linda … ha ha). [hic - pardon me AGAIN!] Pass a cordial would ya? Maybe that'll mask that happy odor on my breath.

And to pass the time, a little photo show of Christmas' past featuring Sparky and Wiregrass Steve. That's me above in 1961 (I was 5 years old). Look at that pose. Gosh, even then I was a little ham. "Pam the Ham" is what they called me. If the camera was on, I was in front of it! ...

... and Sweetie's photo was taken in 1952 (he was 4). He was cute even then. :o) His mom said he was telling Santa he didn't believe in him. Pretty nervy for a kid approaching the Zero Hour of Christmas I would say! [lol]

Y'all come back soon now! Thanks for stopping by! 'Bye 'Bye!
Have A Very Merry Christmas!!
♥ ∞

Friday, December 12, 2008

A Christmas In Bloggyland Tour

Our dear bloggy friend in the strange far off land of Florida is hosting a Christmas in Bloggyland Tour on Monday, December 15! Everyone - and that means you - is invited to participate and share your holiday spirit with your bloggyfriends - however you wish - on the 15th.

Show your decorations, your memories, stories, pictures, recipes, music, art, poetry, nature - anything - whatever you like on your Christmas in Bloggyland post for the 15th.

1. Leave a comment on the MuseSwings post saying you'll be there!
2. Make a copy of the invitation and post it on your blog!
3. Add the HTML back to this post or to MuseSwings.
4. Tell your bloggiebuddies and bring more friends! Party! Party! Party!

MuseSwings will post the names of all of the participants on the 15th so everyone can take the Bloggyland Tour and visit all of the wonderful Christmas in Bloggyland posts.

Travel from blog to blog to see what wonderful things our bloggyfriends have done to celebrate the holidays. Leave comments! Have a wonderful adventure.

As always, the tour lasts all day and evening and covers every time zone and country.

I personally will only be able to participate half a day as I have Jury Duty in the afternoon. I love having Jury Duty here, it's actually fun! I get to see who's doing what to whom and why. I enjoy that but I'm nosey. [tee hee]

So jump in! The water's fine (or snow, if the case may be). See ya there my friends! Hope you can make it.


♥ ∞

Thursday, December 11, 2008

On-Line Typing Test

I've slowed down a bit due to arthritis, but, I've still got it!

67 words

Speed test


Years ago, in the early 1980's, when taking the test to work for a job with the State of Florida Vital Statistics, I was clocked at over 75 wpm. That was with youthful fingers and long polished finger nails. I guess, the 'ol girl has still got it. :o)

Hey, how do you like the new background? It was time for a change.

It has rained cats and dawgs all day. It rained so hard earlier that it was actually raining sideways! Southeast Georgia was under a tornado watch but thankfully that has passed uneventfully. Well, can't go outside. Decorations are up. Everything is done. Sweetie is on a western Georgia hunting trip.

Not much going on today. [sigh]

Maybe tomorrow will be more fun.

God bless y'all!

♥ ∞

Southeast Georgia Alien Plant Life

Stepping through the sliding glass doors, rather than being greeted by the deliciously sweet aroma of dried autumn leaves to which I am accustomed, I was repulsed instead by a most odious smell. I searched around this area of the house, attempting to locate the perpetrator of my nose hair burning.

Finally, I pin pointed the source.

Under a back stoop, lo and behold, there was a freshly born alien plant life. I screamed at the top of lungs "Sweetie, come here! What is this!?"

My husband came tearing outside, "What's wrong?!" Probably thinking I had cut my hand off or something.

I asked him, "WHAT is THAT!" pointing at the odious offender.

He calmly responded "Oh, that's just a Stinkhorn. We used to call it 'stink cabbage' when I was kid." Then he continued to relate how they as youths would throw these horrible things at each other! [sigh] Boys ...

I had to look this thing up on the internet.

At the web site MushroomExpert.Com, the little monster has a rather fancy name of Clathrus columnatus, aka Stinkhorn.

"Ecology: Saprobic; growing alone or gregariously; often near woody debris (and apparently sometimes growing right out of the sides of living trees); in lawns, gardens, cultivated soil, and so on; from North Carolina to the Gulf coast, and in Mexico (reported as far north as New York); October through March."

Sure enough, there's wood mulch under the stoop and it's the right time of year.

Well, next time my nostril radar picks up one of these, I'm running the other way! The mushroom is a lovely orange color but it smells like dog doo on steroids. So, it just goes to show one, you can't judge a mushroom by it's color.

♥ ∞